Friends and family

Today: Proverbs 16-18

Perhaps one of the most tragic things I've seen in life is the break-ups of great friends and great families. And on the flip side, one the BEST things I've ever experienced is friends who are like family and family members who are actually friends.

I think the writer of today's passage may have had a similar experience. Take another look at a few verses from today's chapters:

Overlook an offense and bond a friendship;

fasten on to a slight and—good-bye, friend!

The start of a quarrel is like a leak in a dam,

so stop it before it bursts.

Friends love through all kinds of weather,

and families stick together in all kinds of trouble.

Words kill, words give life;

they're either poison or fruit—you choose.

Friends come and friends go,

but a true friend sticks by you like family.

What causes friendships to break? What pulls families apart? In many cases, it starts with words--words that are hurtful or positive words that are left unsaid. Sometimes those words lead to offenses...and in the most tragic cases, unforgiveness, bitterness and brokenness.

On the flip side, encouraging words, a Facebook post or a handwritten card from a great friend or family member can strengthen bonds. Love, loyalty and forgiveness are the bonds that hold friends and families together. Good relationships take effort--they will cost you time, energy and sometimes, doing and saying what you want.

One thing I've learned so far? You can't keep score. If you do, love never wins (and neither will you). Fight for who and what you love most--forgive.

Tomorrow: Proverbs 19-21

Be happy

Today: Proverbs 13-15

Today's passage was filled with zillions more two-liners (see yesterday's discussion). I could have easily written many pages about each one. Instead, I'm choosing something simple:

A miserable heart means a miserable life;

a cheerful heart fills the day with song.

This nugget of truth is small. It seems like...well, common sense. How many of us have heard the song "Don't Worry, Be Happy"? Or watched a Disney movie with an extra chipper character?

But by the same token, how many of us have met Christians--God's people--who looked like they just sucked gallons of lemon juice? Have you ever met a Christian who reminded you of Debbie Downer? I have.

There are people who would argue, "The world has some serious problems! It's not realistic for Christians to be Little Miss/Mr. Sunshine." I agree that there are serious problems in our world. But of anyone on this planet, I think Christians should be the most happy and hope-filled. I'm not saying that we shouldn't recognize problems--on the contrary, I believe we should see problems, but view them from a standpoint of God's reality. God obviously knows about all the good and bad things that are happening on this planet--but He can always do something great in and/or through any situation. That's something to cheer about.

Two-liners...

Today: Proverbs 10-12

Most of us have heard of one-liners--those snappy comments that are funny or insightful (and sometimes both!). Today's passage had a lot of interesting two-liners, mostly about wisdom and foolishness. Here are a few that stood out most to me:

The more talk, the less truth;

the wise measure their words.

When the storm is over, there's nothing left of the wicked;

good people, firm on their rock foundation, aren't even fazed.

The stuck-up fall flat on their faces,

but down-to-earth people stand firm.

When you're kind to others, you help yourself;

when you're cruel to others, you hurt yourself.

Like a gold ring in a pig's snout
is a beautiful face on an empty head.

A life devoted to things is a dead life, a stump;

a God-shaped life is a flourishing tree.

Fools are headstrong and do what they like;

wise people take advice.

Worry weighs us down;

a cheerful word picks us up.

Tomorrow: Proverbs 13-15

Wisdom and real life

Today: Proverbs 7-9

What makes life--well, come to life? What makes it real and amazing and enjoyable?

This excerpt (where the voice of Wisdom is speaking) gives a few answers that may be pretty unexpected to many people:

Mark a life of discipline and live wisely;

don't squander your precious life.

Blessed the man, blessed the woman, who listens to me,

awake and ready for me each morning,

alert and responsive as I start my day's work.

When you find me, you find life, real life,

to say nothing of God's good pleasure.

But if you wrong me, you damage your very soul;

when you reject me, you're flirting with death."

Interesting, right? Discipline and wisdom help us savor the beautiful moments in our lives. Wisdom gives life to our lives...and helps us to put a smile on God's face (so to speak). Keep going after wisdom.

Tomorrow: Proverbs 10-12

John Mayer, love and wisdom

Today: Proverbs 4-6

"Who do you love?
Me?
Or the thought of me?
Me or the thought of me?"*

These lyrics from a John Mayer song popped into my head as I read today's passage. I realize that may sound a little strange, but I'll explain. I think these lyrics convey the fact that there can be a big difference between what people want to love, say they love, think they love...and what they actually love.

Take wisdom, for example. If I asked people on the street, "Do you think wisdom is important?" or "Do you think wisdom is worth pursuing?", I bet that 99% of them would say, "Yeah--absolutely!" But I wonder...do they actually love wisdom? Do you? Do I?

Take a look at this section from today's passage:

"Take this to heart.
Do what I tell you—live!
Sell everything and buy Wisdom!
Forage for Understanding!
Don't forget one word!
Don't deviate an inch!
Never walk away from Wisdom—
she guards your life;
love her—
she keeps her eye on you.
Above all and before all, do this: Get Wisdom!
Write this at the top of your list: Get Understanding!
Throw your arms around her—
believe me, you won't regret it;
never let her go—
she'll make your life glorious.
She'll garland your life with grace,
she'll festoon your days with beauty."

Why wouldn't anyone like Wisdom, right?

However, I wonder if to many people, Wisdom feels like the It Guy/Girl--"the One" that we're supposed to love and destined to be with...who feels a bit unattainable. We're like the intimidated guy afraid to approach the most amazing girl at the school/church/office because...we don't know what to say or do. Will Wisdom love us back? Is Wisdom too hard to get? Are we not worthy of Understanding?

On another extreme, I think there are some people who feel like Wisdom is the one who's "perfect on paper"...but too complex. They see Wisdom as one who "expects too much," who will hold them accountable and tell them the truth...and they're not ready for it. Something else distracts them--something that still looks sort of pretty because it's just Comfortable or Good Enough. They don't pursue Wisdom and always wonder, "What if...?" They live their lives in regret asking, "What would my life have been like with Wisdom in it?", "Would I have been happier?" and "How could have Wisdom changed me?"

Here's the thing: I don't think you and I want to be in those boats. I don't want to be the one who is just plain intimidated or lazy. I want to be the girl living in love with Wisdom--the girl who is changed by Wisdom (for the better!) even though it might not always be easy or comfortable. Loving Wisdom does take some effort--but when you love something or someone, you're not afraid to go after it and hold on no matter what. Real love requires 100% of your heart.

*Lyrics from "I Don't Trust Myself (with Loving You" by John Mayer.

Tomorrow: Proverbs 7-9

The graduation speech

Today: Proverbs 1-3

Do you know what people are most afraid of?

It's not dying, a terrorist attack or even spiders.

It's public speaking.

One of the weird things about me? I actually like it.

Almost 11 years ago I was preparing to speak at my high school graduation ceremony (it was on June 4--I do remember that!). I had 10-15 minutes to address my classmates and a room filled with about 1,000 of their parents, friends and relatives. I don't remember exactly what I said, but I'm sure I prayed a lot beforehand...and tried to sound smart, funny, inspiring, deep and challenging. It was a lofty goal for an 18-year old speaker with 10 minutes on the clock.

What do you say when your life is about to change forever?

What do you say when you don't want to say "goodbye"?

What do you say when you just want to cry...and laugh...together?

I wish that I said something like this:

Don't lose your grip on Love and Loyalty.

Tie them around your neck;

carve their initials on your heart.

Earn a reputation for living well

in God's eyes and the eyes of the people.

Trust God from the bottom of your heart;

don't try to figure out everything on your own.

Listen for God's voice in everything you do,

everywhere you go;

he's the one who will keep you on track.

Don't assume that you know it all.

Run to God!

Run from evil!

Your body will glow with health,

your very bones will vibrate with life!

Honor God with everything you own;

give him the first and the best.

Your barns will burst,

your wine vats will brim over.

But don't, dear friend, resent God's discipline;

don't sulk under his loving correction.

It's the child he loves that God corrects;

a father's delight is behind all this.

That's a pretty good speech, right? I thought about ending it early...with the "Your barns will burst and your wine vats will brim over" line. But I think the last paragraph is important--perhaps the MOST important. It's a reminder that God may sometimes correct us because He loves us. More importantly, He delights in us:

• When we hold tight to Love and Loyalty...and when we see the folly of our indifference and betrayal,
  
• When we trust Him and when we see that we're not completely in charge,
  
• When we listen to Him and when we learn from our mistakes,
  
• When we honor Him and when we learn to depend on His provision, and
  
• When we love Him through it all...because He's always there loving us SO MUCH more.

Things I don't understand

Today: Psalm 146-150

There are a few things in life that I just don't understand. Things like...the mullet. Crocs with socks. Girls who don't like chocolate. Bob Dylan's music. Calculus. Drivers who forget to turn off their blinkers. People in Seattle who hate coffee.

Okay...there are a lot of things in life I don't understand. :)

When it comes to God, there are DEFINITELY some things I still don't get. I still don't understand the "little" things about God--like why did He create mosquitoes? :) On the serious side, I definitely don't understand bigger things about God, either. How does He keep track of all of us human beings, animals, plants, planets...and mosquitoes...simultaneously?

I think the writer of this psalm wrestled with some of the same questions:

He heals the heartbroken
and bandages their wounds.
He counts the stars
and assigns each a name.
Our Lord is great, with limitless strength;
we'll never comprehend what he knows and does.

This small paragraph illustrates the undefinable nature of God: He's personal enough to touch and heal real people in need, but big and powerful enough to name the stars and keep track of them all. Wow.

The best responses we can have?

Trust God always.
Know what we don't know.
Believe Him (which is also important in the moments when we think we know the answers).
Be thankful...that no matter what, He sees, knows, and absolutely LOVES us...even when we don't necessarily understand why.

Tomorrow: Proverbs 1-3